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Saturday, 23 November 2013

Man Discovers Fossilized Sasquatch Head in Utah?

Man Discovers Fossilized Sasquatch Head in Utah?

Last week I was walking through the woods when I saw something lying in the bushes near the path. Upon further investigation, I discovered it was a dead Werewolf. I decided to take it home and I now keep it under my bed. It keeps me company on those days when I remember that I have no friends (*cries*). What, you think I’m crazy for having a dead Werewolf for a friend? Well, this guy in Utah totes around a fossilized Bigfoot head in the trunk of his car. (Who’s the crazy one now?) That’s right, Todd May claims he discovered a fossilized Bigfoot in Ogden Canyon, Utah around 6-7 weeks ago (sometime in May 2013). The 59 year-old “semi-retired” private eye says that he was out in the canyon one day when something caught his eye. It was an odd looking rock. Curious, he went and dug it out. When he inspected it closer, he saw that it had a face. Todd realized that the 70 pound rock may actually not be a rock, but a fossilized Sasquatch skull. He came to this conclusion because he’s apparently seen living Bigfoots in the recent years and thinks the skull looks to be similar in shape and size. His first encounter was in April 2011 near the mouth of Ogden Canyon. Todd says he was relaxing and just before dark, he spotted something emerge from the bushes across the river. A black-haired creature with a silky coat appeared. At first he thought it might’ve been some escaped Gorrila from the zoo, but that’s when it hit him that this was a real Bigfoot (Of coarse!). Fast forward to May 2013 when his most recent sighting occurred. Two weeks after he’d found the fossilized skull, at around 2 a.m., Todd says he heard something breaking branches and throwing rocks in the water. Thinking it was just some obnoxious people or some kind of animal, he went out to investigate. Suddenly, Todd shined his light on what’d been making the noises. In the trees down the trail, a tall, big Sasquatch was looking at him. Frozen, Todd stared at the creature for about a minute before he heard someone across the way yell, “Oh my gosh, it’s a monster!”. He was glad that hear that somebody else had seen it.

Kenneth Carpenter, a paleontologist who’s the director and curator at Utah State University Eastern’s Prehistoric Meuseum, says that what Todd found is definitely not a fossilized skull. He admits that it’s the most “monster-looking” rock he’s ever seen, but that several key features are missing from a real skull. he also stated that it looks more like a head than a skull. The lack of eye sockets, nose opening and teeth lead him to believe that this is just a rock. The way it’s shaped is just an odd way it’s weathered. “When a human head starts to decompose,” He said. “the first areas to go are those soft tissue high in water, namely the eyes. Thus, even if the eyelids are closed, the eye socket is seen as a collapse of the eyelid into the socket. Scavengers, including coyotes, rodents, insects, etc., feed on tissue. For them it is an easy meal. That is why murder corpses in the outdoors are little more than bones.” Another paleontologist, Brooks B. Britt at Brigham Youn University in Provo, says he gets calls about these kinds of things all the time. Most of the times it just turns out to be a rock that’s shaped interestingly. Todd says that he’s willing to led the fossilized skull out to scientists so they can examine it, but he’s worried that it’ll fall into the wrong person’s hands “where it just sort of disappears”. “I wouldn’t mind, I just don’t want to get it lost.” He said.

And you laughed at me being friends with Fang. Yes, I named my dead Werewolf friend Fang. He’s an awesome friend, though he is starting to smell. I’ll have to go buy some Lysol for him later. But for now, let’s talk about Todd’s Bigfoot skull. When I first saw a picture of it, I thought it looked like a rock. Sure it looks like it has a face. But other than the odd cracks and groves on one side, it looks like any other rock. You have to ask yourself, why is there only the head? Where’s the body? How come there’s no evidence of where the neck was? What, is it like pac-man where it was just born a head? As amazing as it would for this guy to have found an actual fossilized Bigfoot skull, I think that this is just a rock. But what do you think? Did this man really discover a fossilized bigfoot head, or has he completely gone off his ROCKer?

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